July 2015

Choosing to stay positive

I have often heard people say, that our feelings our guided by our thoughts.

Each day we make different choices in our lives, but liimageke a pebble that skims a lake surface, there will always be a ripple effect.

The same can be said of our actions.

I have a variety of CDs that I listen to as I drive to work. The Cds provoke different emotion.

Evidently, powerful music provokes powerful emotion and often allows expression. It is well known that what we listen to affects our feelings. Classical music induces relaxation, Dance music may provoke adrenalin and a serotonin boost, and so on.

The point is, that despite our circumstances, we make a choice to remain positive despite adversity.

Choose the positive , happy CD that inspires hope and happiness, self confidence.

Nobody else is responsible for our own happiness. We need to make that choice for ourselves. Each day. Every day. Writing a gratitude list.

Recently I started beginning my day with a quiet prayer of trust in the day.

And ending the day with gratitude. Learning to be grateful for things that are so easily taken for granted but so precious.

Health, Family, Friends, being alive I am so grateful for today.

It is so easy to question the meaning of existence, when we survive in a highly pressured, 9 to 5 culture.

But if we take a step back, in a quiet moment , set aside each day, to reflect, there are always things to be grateful for, things we could have done better and things we will learn from.

Life is a journey. Full of stepping stones. But we each choose our destination.

Often, it is easy to become so absorbed in what we think matters, to what actually matters the most.

So many people have to endure the pain of acquiring wisdom through the virtue of hindsight, looking back on life’s emotional rollercoaster,.

But we don’t need to endure that if we make wiser choices.

Choosing to forgive, instead of harbouring a grudge, will set us free.

Choosing to love, even when we don’t always feel like loving somebody.

Choosing to change our perspective to a higher perspective.

Choosing to open our minds to people around us, accepting others as they are, without our own bias or prejudice.

Choosing to see beauty in each day. Choosing to see the good in people, instead of the bad. Nobody is perfect.

Persevering in life, through hardships and pain, even when there appears to be no other way out,

Sunshine always follows rain,

A harsh winter is always followed by the fresh inviting evolution of a bright spring, daffodils and newborn lambs bleating in the fields.

Sunrise always follows sunset

And I truly believe out of bad, always comes goodness.

One of the most profound experiences of my life was working nightshift on an oncology ward, because I spent lots of time with people facing terminal illness.

After I had dished out a variety of anti sickness medication and pain relief to alleviate symptoms of this ferocious illness, I would often engage in the most meaningful of conversations I have or will ever have in my life. I treasured this time. I will never forget those quiet times at night, the feelings of fear expressed by those suffering and the hopelessness at leaving behind a life they adored and a family they cherished deeply.

It invoked a sense of powerlessness within me. Because there was nothing I could do or say that would ever pacify this situation. All I could do was listen. And enable it to change me and my perspective.

Often in life we face situations and we are desperate for resolution, or for something or someone to change, we all we actually need is change within ourselves.

I have found much solace in the value of acceptance. There will be things I can control. There will be things I cannot control. But the greatest ability I have within is to accept when I have no control and make a change in myself to allow growth in the situation.

Comfort does not promote growth.

A flower does not flourish under a constant shower of rain or a blast of prolonged sunshine, instead it withers and dies.

Our spirits lie within us, in a similar fashion, in order to grow, we need to embrace change and growth and adapt to the conditions around us even painful and challenging situations because they enhance the greatest growth within us.

Working in the oncology ward changed me, it gave me insight into my abilities as a person, what I found fulfilling, what I did not find fulfilling and where I wanted to make the most difference. It also instigated a transition in my concrete mindset that ensured I would always embrace life to the best of my ability, people, places , things.

Never wasting a precious day or moment. Attempting to try and live on good terms with those around me at all times, attempting to strip away any negative feeling within me, through the power of forgiveness or choosing to ask forgiveness to those I had hurt.

I would rather swallow pride than live in regret. It is a very hard lesson to learn. And nobody really need to wait until it is too late to make that mistake. A fight and negativity can last a few days/weeks/even years but regret stays with you for a lifetime and an eternity. It is a choice.

So too is our choice to live in a positive mindset , being grateful for those things around us and valuing everything around us.


Purpose lies within

In a world where there is darkness, I await a shining light.

Like gazing into a moonlit sky, so dense is the dark night, I am captivated by the stars.

Though as the bitterness encompasses me, I embrace the night, the stars staring back at me.

I am filled with awe and incensed with wonder, and drawn to their beauty.

I realise in that moment, my significance in comparison to such a diverse array of natural wonder that surrounds me.

I am miniscule when I stand under the umbrella of the universe that encapsulates me.

Sometimes I feel so insignificant.

But I realise. I am I.

I am unique. I am special. There is noone, nor ever has been anyone like me before.

Noone can be me. Noone can be you. We are all set apart in our own incomparable measure.

I exist here and now, living, breathing and existing in my own conscious/subconscious world.

And in that moment, I see myself from a higher perspective, dissociated from a world perspective.

I was created with a purpose. So are you. My purpose lies ahead of me.

But the gifts I need to fulfil my purpose exist within me, deep within my heart.

I live in a world filled with fighting , torture, adversity, injustice, dishonesty, deceit, greed, and hatred.

But my heart is filled with love.

I wish I could drain hatred from people’s hearts and fuel them with love instead.

That would be a perfect world.

People forget themselves,

Values, conceptions, ideas, whole identities vanish,

in a race to become what society rates as success.

We lose the one thing we value most….ourselves.

Like driving through a blanket of thick fog,

It is so easy to become lost.

Searching and searching and searching like a small child that has lost their favourite teddy bear,

People lose themselves and feel there is no way back..

Like losing a key to a treasure chest that contains the most valuable, precious items you will ever own.

I learn in times of desolation and quiet despair, that I already have the key within my mind which holds the ability to unlock the silent treasure within my own heart.

Every individual has a precious treasure within their own heart. A beautiful handmade treasure chest carved by the creator from up above.

And within, the most valuable, unique assets we will ever own.

And people forget that the most significant treasure they will ever gain ,

they are already in ownership of.

It isnt material. It isn’t success. It isn’t power,or popularity or other false and flawed ideation that will stabilise your identity .

It is your own inner treasure. Like a pot of gold. Its worth and value never changes.

Like a fingerprint, so unique and intricate, so are you.

You have meaning and purpose and value, nothing and nobody can change.

If you can only open your eyes and search deep within, and see your own hidden treasure.

There is a reason you breathe, exist and live.

Every answer you will ever need lies within.

And your purpose is found when you utilise those gifts that you find within.


After many years of studying why people make decisions to end their own lives, I have decided to write a blog aimed at promoting positivity and purpose in the lives of individuals who feel in any way hopeless or generally struggling to maintain identity in a fluctuating society that determines value based upon materialistic values or success.

photo 5

The current trend in suicide rates was reflected in the recent recession and economic downturn, suggesting that such individuals may attach their own inner purpose to a career or financial status, and when such factors so intrinsic to daily life and existence dissipate, so does ones ability to perceive a positive future.

Not only is this the case in a general society, particularly men, but equally, it is apparent rates of self harm are rising amongst children and adolescents suggestive of a deep rooted symptom that perhaps there is an erupting identity crisis and that the foundations on which some aspects of  humanity/society exist is lacking an established base and therefore subsists in a disharmonious state.

My blog will concede to an open possibility, however idealistic, that there are answers to an inconclusive question, at least I hope there is an answer, and in my blog I hope to promote a thought provoking conclusion to an inconclusive question that still remains unanswered .

Create a free website or blog at

Up ↑